“Marriage is honorable in all…” (Hebrews 13:4). “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh”
(Genesis 2:24). “God…hateth putting away (divorce)” (Malachi 2:16). This is a small part of what God teaches about marriage. Yet, even the casual observer would see that modern marriages seldom reflect God’s teaching on marriage. Some places in America have seen three couples marrying while two couples were divorcing.
First, there is too little commitment to God’s teaching on marriage, divorce, and re-marriage. Read Matthew 19:9. We need to eliminate divorce from our vocabulary. Let’s not even joke about it. If either husband or wife enters marriage with the attitude, “Well, I can always get a divorce,” they probably will. The “marriage is for life” attitude is a MUST.
Second, problems in marriage, an inevitable reality, are allowed to wreck the marriage. Several common problems faced by marriages are money, infidelity, selfishness, and lack of communication. For instance, many couples have lived as if their marriage vows read, “till debt do us part.” The American society generally
suffers from uncontrollable greed, unrestrained wants, and easy credit. Listen to the Bible on the love of money, “For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.
Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves through with many griefs” (2 Timothy 6:10). Divorce is just one grief that the love of money has led to. Learn to be happy living within your means.
Another definite problem is infidelity. Infidelity will wreck your marriage. Infidelity (fornication/adultery) is the only reason God allows divorce and subsequent remarriage (Matthew 19:9). God says, “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge” (Hebrews 13:4). Open marriages and free love notwithstanding, adultery is still wrong! Men and women, be careful!
It takes no Solomon to see that when two become one, each of the two will have to do some giving up. What each must give up is selfishness. Each should be concerned, not for his own needs and wants, but the needs and wants of the other. The Golden Rule should be the rule of marriage.
A last problem is lack of communication. It has been reported that “poor communication is the main problem in 86% of all troubled marriages.” The Bible recognizes the power of words. Solomon says that the tongue has the power of life and death (Prov. 18:21). “Reckless words pierce like a sword,” he affirms (Prov.
12:18). On the other hand, “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing bones” (Prov. 16:24). Develop good communication skills.
Make your marriage good!
– Steve Housley
Steve Housley is a former Pulpit Minister for Eastern Meadows Church of Christ.
